How Healthy is Your Ego?

Brokering is an industry in which having a strong ego makes a difference, because I can assure you that your ego is going to take a beating. If it is already fragile then this is the sort of industry that will knock it out for the count.

For instance, if you are entering this business without without any warm connections in the real estate or finance arenas, then it is going to be all about the cold calls. For every phone call you make, a percentage of prospects will meet with you. A percentage of those meetings will lead to applications. The percentages will differ based on your strengths.

If you need to make 40 phone calls to arrange four meetings and those meetings lead to one application, and if one in three of those applications results in a file, then you need to make 120 phone calls a week. You need to drum up 120 names and phone numbers each week until you can rely on referrals from satisfied clients. It takes a strong, healthy self-regard to keep that up, and to weather the barrage of nos from other sources.

In an earlier post I discussed the benefits of personality testing. One thing these tests will reveal is if you have an ego that can take a beating.

There is a passage in the truly stellar book The Ultimate Sales Machine by Chet Holmes that outlines very succinctly why a high “DI” score (DISC Personality Profile), and correspondingly strong ego, work so well for individuals on the front lines with clients. A strong ego evokes emotional resilience. A strong ego inoculates you against the word no. The word no is simply the response given to a question worded improperly. Pause, re-group, re-phrase and try again.

In business, any yes worth getting was preceded by at least one no.

There is little doubt that the majority of top-producing Brokers, be they mortgage, real estate, insurance or stock brokers, will all score a high DI.

You need to be optimistic and believe you’ve got the stuff to succeed. If you believe in yourself, others will believe in you. Confidence is contagious. If you’re a believer, they’ll become a believer.

However, ego-busting news is common in the Mortgage Broker business, and it’s important to learn how to accept it graciously at all times.

The other side of ego

The flip side of a strong ego is that it can get in the way, especially in the face of challenging news.

A lot of people are like Jekyll and Hyde. Out in the world they’re happy-go-lucky, but behind closed doors with their buddy they’re cranky or embittered or prejudiced. People can see through facades and they’re not likely to provide referrals to those who wear two faces. A short-fused reactor is not someone any of us wants to be around.

How you portray yourself to others is critical to your success. If you are warm, generous and smiling, people around you are likely to be the same. If you’re a black cloud, you’ll probably attract other people filled with gloom and doom. Or you may find yourself alone. Alone is obviously not a path to success.

Be proactive, as I have outlined above. Do not be reactive. Absorb news, digest it, then act calmly with logic and thought. Forming this sort of thoughtful calm approach is not simple; it is not instant.

This is brokering. Learning to work with the longer, slower flow of communication in all aspects of life will prove fruitful in your career.